A few positives and negatives of solo travel

As my trip comes to a close, I've been finding myself rather reflective this past week. This has been an incredible trip with some of the most intense highs I have ever experienced, and of course, some lows. I went on this trip by myself because I couldn't find a travel buddy who wanted to go for the same amount of time, same budget, countries, etc, and I was sick of waiting to do something I had always wanted to do. But I'm not going to lie -there were definitely some knots in my stomach when I left! Travelling alone, I was unsure of what I would experience, where I would go, and who I would meet. As these four months now draw to a close I have to say though, solo travel is not NEARLY as intimidating, and the world not nearly as big and scary as one might believe. Despite any downsides of solo travel and any lonely days or inconveniences I have had: I would do it again in a heartbeat.

So here you have it -just a few thoughts that have been bouncing around my head this past week.

 

Solo travel....

• Forces you to learn to rely on yourself in a way that you never have before. It forces you to always think of your own safety first, whether that means always knowing where your valuables are, or just considering how you will get home from a night out if no-one wants to leave at the same time. No matter how awesome new people you meet are, you just can't put your full faith in them when you've just met. I have found that learning to rely on yourself and doing it successfully makes me feel empowered and strong, and it makes me feel like there isn't really anything that I can't do.
• It allows you to be flexible, to change your plans at a moment's notice, and to have experiences that you would have never had otherwise. If I hadn't been travelling solo, I never would have bought a motorcycles with a friend I met travelling, or changed my plans to stay an extra long amount of time in Koh Tao to get my Open Water and my Advanced diving certifications. I would never would have been able to reunite so frequently with or change my plans almost daily to actually travel with so many people I met along the way. It seems scary to travel alone, but it is surprising how many other solo travellers are out there, and how like minded so many of them are. This is actually probably my most favourite part of solo travel -you meet so many other travellers all the time, that very rarely are you ever actually "solo".
• You meet people with the most fascinating stories. You meet people who couldn't be more different from you in how they've grown up. You meet people that you feel like you've already known all your life. Travel is the number one way (I think) of meeting interesting people with even more interesting stories. From the Urologist working on patenting new surgical techniques to the Thai bartender with 3 children at 23 to the semi-pro soccer player, to the investment banker who quit his job to become a dive instructor, to the American student who became fluent in Bahasa Indonesian in only 3 months, to the local artist who has been exhibiting worldwide and is excited about that -travelling solo really gets you out there and allows you to meet people that you likely wouldn't meet if you were only travelling with a group.
• A downside: having to re-explain your story to every new person you meet. Occasionally you can feel jaded, ie: "Why do I even bother talking to this person, when in 20min from now I will never see them again?". Sometimes it is hard to force yourself to care about making those first few steps to get to know someone when you meet so many people in a day, and when you know that many you will not see again (This of course, all depends on the day and the circumstances).
• It forces yourself to learn to like yourself, as you'll be the one constant source throughout your trip. In these past four months I have met some of the most incredible people and honestly, there have been very few days that I've actually travelled alone. However, there have been days where I have only met honeymooning couples, or there has been a complete lack of foreigners/people who speak English, or I have met someone who I just don't really click with and I just have to make the best of it. I think learning to enjoy your own company is an important aspect to learn in general, but especially so while travelling solo. Although, that being said, I am still an extrovert and do still get antsy if I go a day or two on my own without meeting anyone!
• This one may seem a bit obvious, but I've learned that if you are out somewhere and you just aren't feeling the vibe or enjoying yourself, you are allowed to leave! It's pretty empowering to realize that you don't have any pressure to be any type of person. If you're at a party but you're not really enjoying yourself, and would rather go home, that is ok. Do what makes you happy. Most people you are around have just met you anyways, and there are no preconceptions as to what kind of a person you are. You get to make your own choices about what you enjoy, and then just simply do what you want to do.
• You get over eating alone at a restaurant awfully quick. Plus side: Your opinion is the only one that matters when you choose the restaurant. You would be surprised at how many other people you may find there alone -it's really not a big deal. Eat at the bar, and you've almost got guaranteed conversation!
• You learn to adapt, to be laid back, and to be ok if things don't exactly go to plan. This of course is not only part of solo travel -it's probably part of backpacking or travelling in general -but it certainly has been true for solo travel as well. Bus leaves 5hrs after it's scheduled? Kind of annoying, but you'll get there eventually. Restaurant misunderstands you because of a lack of english, and sends you something completely random? Well, who said you couldn't eat fried bananas for dinner instead of noodles? (This happened last night.)
• It allows you to see how richly blessed you are in general. Sometimes I think about the fact that I came from a country in which women are considered equal and it isn't that unusual for a woman to travel alone. Or, I think about the fact that I have been encouraged by my parents to go to school in something in which I am interested in, and will (hopefully) have a profitable and fulfilling career -something that is not true for much of the world. Or, I think about the fact that I have been able to work at a job that has allowed me to save, and that has paid me enough that saving for travel is a reasonable thing to do. There is no pressure for me to settle down and have children at a very young age, or to work in the family business, and being able to actually think about leisure and what makes me feel fulfilled in life is something that I actually have time for. I don't mean to be saying that people who come from poor or rural areas in many parts of the world don't feel happy -far from it! Many have much closer family and community connections than the average westerner, and some of the problems that exist in the west -like being overstressed, or overworked, or having no time for friends and family because of too much work -don't exist here in the same way. However, travel has still made me feel so incredibly grateful for the life that I have been born into.

 

 

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Bali, and beginning thoughts of home

Pretty Bali

Well, I've had about a week now in Bali, and I think it's probably time for an update!

This entire trip has had a real mix of time on the beaten path with other tourists, and of course, a lot of time spent in cities where tourists are a lot more rare, where people don't speak English, and where negotiation, thinking on your feet and constantly feeling like a fish out of water have been common parts of life. And honestly, some of the "off the beaten path" parts of my trip have been some of the best. There's no better way to get to know what a country is actually like than to stay in cities where people look at you like you've gotten lost just for being there. Discovering local culture and how people outside of Canada really live is one of the main reasons why I travel. However, that being said, it can also be exhausting at times.

When I first told people that I was coming to Bali, I was warned by most other backpackers who had been here. "It's verrrrry touristy" some warned. "Don't get sucked in by the Eat Pray Love phenomenon" others cautioned. "Kuta beach is just like Miami or Ibiza. Not the real Indonesia at all", I was told.

And they were right.

Bali doesn't really feel like the "real" Indonesia in many ways. Restaurants and bars are slick, decorative touches are everywhere, and designer stores line the streets. Everything is clean, and sometimes it seems like Westerners outnumber the locals. The busy dusty chaos, local markets, and cheap food stalls seem a lifetime away in some areas in Bali, and in a way I'm glad I didn't start here -it would have driven me crazy to feel like I had just moved from one Westernized country to another. However, after four months of travel, I'm finding some of the touristy things... not so bad. I don't mind that there are Balinese dance performances every night and for tourists to see (as opposed to just on special occasions, for the locals) when it means that the culture continues on and I can see them as well. I don't mind finding restaurants with servers that pay attention to you when you walk in, with menus with prices on them (in Vietnam they often just tell you the price, and this varies dramatically based on whether the "tourist tax" is applied). I don't mind the large amounts of yoga in Ubud, the cheap spas, and the amount of beautiful little bungalows and hostels. I also certainly don't mind the perfect sunny, dry weather, cool nights, and perfect beaches that has attracted this huge amount of tourism in the first place.

Cute bungalow in Ubud

Now, that being said, I have also avoided some of the REALLY touristy stuff -the designer stores and pulsing nightlife of Kuta don't do a lot for me. Instead I have preferred to rent motorbikes with friends and explore the countryside. I stayed in a hostel recommended to me by a fellow traveler way back in Malaysia, and was thrilled to find a cute little spot with a lounge area, pool, and many friendly faces. I got in the almost obligatory (for me) scuba dives where I saw my first sea snake, as well as numerous Manta Rays -definitely a highlight of the trip for me! I also connected with a bunch of other backpackers and we went to a pub with live music, hung around the pool, and later rented motorbikes to explore Ubud. I ended up staying in Ubud for three nights with a lovely Italian girl I had met at the hostel, and we enjoyed going to the monkey forest, seeing some close by volcanos and enjoying the resulting hot springs, seeing a traditional dance performance, and going to the spa. We also enjoyed breakfast on the private terrace of one of the cutest bungalows I think I've stayed in yet, all for the high high price of $7.50 each.

Surfing in Seminyak

We then packed all of our bags back onto the motorbike, and made our way across the island to Seminyak where all the beaches and surfing spots are. It was definitely a bit busier there, but we enjoyed the sun, and I was able to check surfing off of my "to-do" list in Bali. I'm not terribly good and two days later I'm still a bit sore, but definitely a good time!

I now only have a week left on my trip (plus a 22hr layover in Bangkok, in which I'll prob get a hostel) before I had back to Canada. It's blowing my mind a bit that my trip is almost over, and I keep thinking about it during random parts of the day -how it will be to adjust to life back home, how it will be so see friends and family and slide back into the life that I had before, and how to share my excitement without being a person who can only ever talk about my trip. I don't want to leave, but I'm definitely excited to see everyone, and to experience simple pleasures like clean laundry hung up in a closet, or soft carpet under the feet. Soon enough I suppose! In the meantime I will enjoy the next 7 days I have booked on the Gili Islands, and I will be home soon enough....

Volcanos in the background!

 

 

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Malaysia, Singapore, Indonesia!!

I was all set to write an interesting, descriptive post about why I loved Malaysia and how interesting I found it, until I found myself having a bit of a rough week. I had my lock picked and Ipad stolen, a few days without meeting too many other backpackers (for the very first time on my trip!), lost a boat ticket and so had to pay again, blew up my phone charger, struggled for several hours to book a flight with no success, and spent almost 40hrs on very cramped buses in about a week. I suppose its reasonable to expect crappy weeks once in awhile though, with travelling for so long. Everyone has their ups and downs at home and it's only natural to expect that once in a while, that happens on the road as well. Thankfully, there have been some big ups as well, especially in the past few days, so things have really balanced out. I'm back to my regular, cheerful self and really: I'm in Indonesia, and living the dream so I guess I really can't complain!

Mosque in Kuala Lumpur

To back up a bit, I left Siem Reap Cambodia, for Kuala Lumpur Malaysia, with about a week in Malaysia planned. After that, it would be two days and one night in Singapore, and then on to Indonesia, with the rest of my travels spent surfing and diving and exploring in Bali, the Gili Islands, and if my money held out, Komodo National park. I found Kuala Lumpur to be very interesting and quite different from anywhere I had travelled so far in that it was very multicultural, had a distinct lack of backpackers (relative to some of the other places I had been that is) and was clearly quite well off financially. I found it fascinating to hear my first hauntingly beautiful call to prayer, and to observe Malays, Indians, Chinese and various other ethnic groups living amicably beside each other. I walked around quite a bit, learned to negotiate public transit to get to my next stop in Malaysia, and checked out markets and temples and landmarks (the KL Bird Park was a huge hit!). I befriended a student who was around my age who was from Nigeria, and found it interesting to talk with him about his experiences as a student and worker in KL. I also enjoyed having a bit of a personal tour guide who spoke some limited Malay!

My next stop was in the Perhentian Islands, in the North East section of the mainland West Malaysia. These islands were absolutely stunning with perhaps the clearest water, whitest sands and best diving I had experienced yet.
Here I must note that when I first started planning my entire trip, I knew for sure that I would be going to Thailand, Cambodia, Laos, and Vietnam, but was unsure about other countries. As such, I made sure I knew all of the main sights in the four countries I mentioned but didn't spend a lot of time looking into things to do in others. It was definitely an experience having landed in Malaysia with having done my research on the country just the day before, and as well as while on my flight. It turns out, there are numerous interesting things to do and I didn't have nearly enough time. I hummed and hawed, but when I found myself in the Perhentian islands I felt like I had found paradise. That combined with a really good group of travellers I fell into, and I didn't want to leave! I ended up spending 5 or 6 days there in total, fitting in maximum diving (including my second night dive!) and beach time. I saw my first turtle, several black tip reef and bamboo sharks, metre long bumbhead parrot fish, moray eels, octopus, squid, and more small colourful fish and soft corals than I could count. We were blessed with beautiful weather and other than the iPad theft, which to be fair, was a serious downer, I really enjoyed my time and didn't want to leave.

The next part of my adventures I will skim over, as I had a few days of maximum travel time, a bit of do-nothing time to recoup, and too much time spent in the inside of a mall searching for another iPad. I travelled from the Perhentians back to KL, then from KL to Singapore. After only two days and one night in Singapore (it was supposed to be more, but the Perhentians ate into my time), I flew to Jakarta Indonesia. I'm excited for Indonesia and now I can say that the country is really beautiful, but for anyone who has been to Jakarta.... it is not. After one night, I boarded one of the worst night buses I have ever taken, and a cramped 13hrs later, stumbled into Yogyakarta.
It took a day or two to get settled into Yogya and at first I found it a bit frustrating. I arrived during the Muslim holiday of Eid al-Fitr, a three day National holiday which celebrates the end of Ramadan. I didn't realize how big this holiday was: almost all muslims make an effort to visit family so shops were closed, traffic was crazy, and accomodations and transport were really booked up. I found a really nice, clean and modern hostel, but found that it was completely filled with locals and their children. Definitely a different vibe than I had become accustomed to in other hostels!

Shitty photo, wonderful girls!!

However, things definitely improved. Eid al-Fitr ended and I was able to get things like laundry done again. The traffic was still pretty terrible, but I met several fellow solo female travellers, and we really connected. There is something so refreshing about meeting fellow women who are travelling by themselves! We have all had similiar experiences in that people thought we were crazy, wondered about our safety, or thought that we just liked alone time. In reality, the women I have met have been some of the friendliest, positive people I've ever met, who have been safe for their entire trip, have spent minimal days alone, and have counted solo travel as one of the best decisions of their life. We spent the next two days packing as much sightseeing and fun in as possible, and I was sad when I had to leave them to fly to Bali.

Several highlights from my time with the girls included a sunrise trip to the Borobodour temples (a massive Buddhist monument and UNESCO world heritage site) and the Prambanan temples, a Hindu temple complex from the 8th century that are the nation's best examples of Hindu art. It was strange here -we were asked for photos countless times with locals, and heard "Boule!!" (foreigner/westerner!) shouted at us everywhere we went. It was strange having a separate entrance (paying more of course), getting free tea and coffee, using nicer washrooms and using the train for free. We also used the foreigner's que for entering the temple, saving about 30min of wait time. At first I felt very bad about this privilege that I had been given, just based on the colour of my skin, but when I realized I paid three times more than the locals... I stopped feeling quite as bad. It was still very strange though, and I'm not really sure what to think. Indonesia is a different place, that's for sure.

We also rented motorbikes (surprise, surprise) to go visit to Parangtritis beach where I finally understood why Indonesia is known as a surfing capital of the world -I've never seen such insanely huge waves! It was a massive flat beach absolutely packed with locals standing around, laughing, and splashing in the waves fully clothed, and with horse carts moving in and out of the crowds. Children laughed and shrieked, and we would go from standing on sand to being thigh deep in water in about one minute -and then back to dry land again in the same amount of time. I've never seen anything like it.

We visited the bird market which I was quite interested to see, but found it to be a bit depressing. No-one wants to see baby owls, scared out of their wits, crammed into a cage for sale. There were many different birds and animals too: pupppies, kittens, snakes, turtles, roosters, pigeons, and of course numerous species of songbird. I did find it cool to see black Java finches, like I had once sold when I worked at SuperPet in high school, and to remember that they are native to this area. We also checked out the Kraton (the Sultan's Palace), Malioboro St, a chaotic and energetic street jammed with street vendors of every kind and food stalls, and went for dinner when our plans to see the Indonesian ballet failed -misunderstanding of dates on our part! Our night ended with beers on the roof of our hostel, from one of the few corner stores licenced to sell alcohol in Yogya. There tends to be a limited nightlife in muslim countries :-P

I am currently writing this from the air, on my flight to Bali -in about one hours time I will be landing. Time has just been flying by (pun not intended), and I can't wait to make the most of my last few weeks in SouthEast asia!

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